Gabrielle+H.

The publishing of //An American Dilemma// and the first heart surgery at John Hopkins Hospital 1944

Vore-5

AP English Language

11 October 2010 THE SOCIAL STANDARD IN TERMS OF RIDING THE BUS I’m writing this on the Metro city bus, while on my way to my mom’s work in the heart of Cincinnati. It’s a forty-five minute ride, which is plenty of time to do some people watching. You learn a great deal about people while riding the bus. My deduction is the bus temporarily holds you captive and forces you to interact with people in an enclosed environment.

A tall, lanky man—we’ll call him Frank—always enters the city bus at exactly 7:03 a.m. A very well dressed man in his three piece pin-striped suit and investment briefcase, he sits down in the front row in the seat by the window and places his briefcase on his lap or on the floor, leaving the seat next to him available. Next on the bus is a stern-faced woman, let’s say, Sarah, who sits near the middle of the bus, placing her purse on the seat by the window, as if she were saving it for someone. Not to be rude, but the purse really serves no purpose, for not one person on the bus wants to sit next to her. Her face always looks pinched, as if she has had the most inconvenient day and you would be wise not mess with her.

Most of the people on the bus are fairly predictable. They sit in the same seat almost every day. I, however, tend to switch things up a little, and today I am sitting next to a lady whose name I know is Rachel, because it’s stitched on her black laptop case in a white script font. Rachel did not seem too happy when I sat next to her. It’s not that she was upset, more like uncomfortable. She positioned herself as close to the window as possible and when I said “Good Morning,” pretended not to hear me, instead acting as if she were scrolling through notifications on her phone.

The bus has a smell, not a bad one, just a peculiar one which makes you wonder what it is and where it’s coming from. Regardless of the smell, the bus is filling up fast. There are people standing, holding the metal bar with a light grasp and probably trying not to concentrate on the amount of germs that have accumulated there that day. Frank makes an effort to smile at the next person coming on the bus—a pale, unshaved man who is clearly in a hurry. “You can sit here if you want.”

The man looks at him and politely says, “Oh no, that’s okay. I’ll stand.”

Next in line is a freckled college aged girl with an empty backpack. Again, Frank smiles. “You can sit here if you want.”

The girl looks at him sweetly and hesitantly says, “Oh no, that’s okay. I’ll stand.”

As more and more people enter the bus (consequently rejecting Frank in the process) there is eventually an unfortunate lack of space. The next stop is the largest stop on the route. I look out the window to see twelve people waiting to get on. The first six decide to stand, which doesn't really shock Frank, though it does seem to kill the false vibrato he’s been displaying in an attempt to tell the bus that he doesn’t mind. Frank yells, “finally!” as the seventh person sits down in the seat next to him.

The eighth victim is an older woman in a red dress, which sways back and forth as she shuffles her way down the bus. If she had only got on the bus before the seventh person, she would not have to sit next to Sarah. Her eyes light up as she finds a seat. She points to the purse by the window, and then at Sarah. “Is anyone sitting there?” Sarah silently shakes her head, and stares back out the window. “Okay…well can I sit there?” Sarah rolls her eyes and huffily places her purse on her lap. Not even moving to the seat next to the window, Sarah inadvertently forces the woman to trip over her scrawny legs and bony knees in an effort to sit down.

My stop is coming up. I look in my wallet to get out the money for the ride. I realize I only have a five dollar bill. The cost for the ride is $2.00, and you can’t get any change back. I turn toward Rachel and ask her if she has change for a five. She looks out the window and says nothing.

WRITERS MEMO My editorial expresses how strangers interact with each other and how impolite some people can be without even realizing it. I chose this topic because it displays American culture, which is what my editorialist, Susan Orlean, typically writes about. Orlean also writes her opinions with detail and descriptions. In her article “Out of the Woods” she uses vivid images to describe the house she stayed at, describing it as “a dingy A-frame, mud-brown, damp, afflicted with an air of unrelieved gloom.” I used descriptions when I described the characters on the bus. “Tall lanky man,” “stern-faced woman,” and “pale unshaved man” are all examples of descriptions I used. Along with her vibrant details and descriptions, Orlean uses personal narratives and anecdotes to display her opinion. I wrote my topic as a personal narrative, using words such as “I,” “my,” and “me.” Orlean uses these narratives and anecdotes to tell the reader her opinion, but she does not blatantly say what her opinion is. Like Orlean, I did not come right out and say my opinion; I let the narrative speak for itself. I believe that my narrative was the strongest aspect of my editorial, however I feel I can add better descriptions and cut back on wordiness. When it comes to rhetoric, Orlean loves pathos. Her emotions can range from humor to sadness, reminiscence and wonder. Pathos is apparent in my essay when no one wants to sit by Frank. At least for me, it made me feel sad and almost rejected as well because I have had experiences like that before. She also uses ethos. Her credibility is always known as she usually shares her opinions from stories she has lived through. Since she has lived through them, the reader believes her when she almost silently communicates her opinion. Because she writes so much on American culture, ethics also plays a big role in much of her writings. In my editorial, the issue with ethics lies along the question “why?” Why do we do these things? Is it right or wrong? When I was reading through Orlean’s editorials, she made me laugh and cry (many times within the same editorial), so when I wrote my editorial I tried to bring out ethos, but mostly pathos. Gabbi, I thought your editorial was great. I completely felt exactly what you were trying to get the reader to feel. Your descriptions add so much to your piece, and it really does seem like a scenario that could occur on a daily basis. From your writer's note I see why you used the techniques that you did. I'm sure its only because its on the Wiki, but be sure to use MLA format. Great job!